Why am I...?
A lot of people ask why I am a Christian. They ask what good it does me, because, after all, all of the amazing stories happend to adults, that's when everyone else becomes 'Real Christians.' This is just what I'm asked and told, by "Christians" and "Non Christians."
I've never answered that question with a sunday school answere, because it's fake to me. I don't think there is a right or a wrong way to answere the question, so usually I just say what comes to mind, but I will admit that I try and choose my words carefully.
This year has been a very hard experiance for me. I've stumbled across more change and new adventures, then I think I have in my whole life combined. For the first time I've Experianced Gods precense, Lost my sister to San Diego, Found out what true community is, lost my best friend, Stopped drinking coffee (my comfort), Admitted that I have a problem (depression), Broken down completely and felt helpless, Felt more alone then I could ever imagine possible, had my heart broken, Opened up to a few friends. I've Found people who want to talk to me, hang out with me, Love me, teach me, learn from me, laugh with me, talk about Christ with me, forgive me, and help me. I've Seen God perform mericles, and I've learned to see his teaching in my everyday life. These are just a few of the things I've experianced and I am experiancing still.
I came home from work today, lied down on my bed, turned on some music, and just took a breath. A breath that told me to slow down, and to relax, a breath reminding me to let God lead my life, and take the burden off my shoulders, a breath saying that it's okay to be tired of life, and okay to just want to press pause. To press pause, fast forward, and rewind. To play, and to slow down and put on slow motion....but I can't do that. Life comes too fast, and it goes by too slow. Things are gone before you realized they had arrived, and wont leave when you want them gone. You experiance things that you wish you didn't have to, and sometimes they cover up the wonderful things that DO effect you in a positive way.
God has been so good to me this year, and my whole life, but I've been so stressed out, I've had my mind on so many things, and I've been so down, hurt, annoyed, confused, and just tired, that I've forgotten to look back. To look back and say thank you to all of those who have given my a smile on a hard day, a hug when I was feelling alone, an encouraing email when I needed a boost, and asking how my day has been, when I didn't want to tell anyone how bad of a day it was. I've needed all these things that so many people have given to me, without realizing it. I look back now and see how wonderful God is to me. How much he gives, even when i feel like he's just waiting for me to fall down under the load.
"But if I go to the east, he is not there;
if I go to the west, I do not find him.
When he is at work in the north, I do not see him;
when he turns to the south, I catch no glimpse of him.
But he knows the way that I take..." (Job 23:8-10)
I've never answered that question with a sunday school answere, because it's fake to me. I don't think there is a right or a wrong way to answere the question, so usually I just say what comes to mind, but I will admit that I try and choose my words carefully.
This year has been a very hard experiance for me. I've stumbled across more change and new adventures, then I think I have in my whole life combined. For the first time I've Experianced Gods precense, Lost my sister to San Diego, Found out what true community is, lost my best friend, Stopped drinking coffee (my comfort), Admitted that I have a problem (depression), Broken down completely and felt helpless, Felt more alone then I could ever imagine possible, had my heart broken, Opened up to a few friends. I've Found people who want to talk to me, hang out with me, Love me, teach me, learn from me, laugh with me, talk about Christ with me, forgive me, and help me. I've Seen God perform mericles, and I've learned to see his teaching in my everyday life. These are just a few of the things I've experianced and I am experiancing still.
I came home from work today, lied down on my bed, turned on some music, and just took a breath. A breath that told me to slow down, and to relax, a breath reminding me to let God lead my life, and take the burden off my shoulders, a breath saying that it's okay to be tired of life, and okay to just want to press pause. To press pause, fast forward, and rewind. To play, and to slow down and put on slow motion....but I can't do that. Life comes too fast, and it goes by too slow. Things are gone before you realized they had arrived, and wont leave when you want them gone. You experiance things that you wish you didn't have to, and sometimes they cover up the wonderful things that DO effect you in a positive way.
God has been so good to me this year, and my whole life, but I've been so stressed out, I've had my mind on so many things, and I've been so down, hurt, annoyed, confused, and just tired, that I've forgotten to look back. To look back and say thank you to all of those who have given my a smile on a hard day, a hug when I was feelling alone, an encouraing email when I needed a boost, and asking how my day has been, when I didn't want to tell anyone how bad of a day it was. I've needed all these things that so many people have given to me, without realizing it. I look back now and see how wonderful God is to me. How much he gives, even when i feel like he's just waiting for me to fall down under the load.
"But if I go to the east, he is not there;
if I go to the west, I do not find him.
When he is at work in the north, I do not see him;
when he turns to the south, I catch no glimpse of him.
But he knows the way that I take..." (Job 23:8-10)
I may not realize that God is at work in my life when he is. I may think he hasn't answered my prayers. But I may just not see what he's up to, and think that I know what's going on. The truth is I have NO control over what happens to me, or how I effect others. What I DO have control over is HOW I deal with a situation and how I treat others....that's all I have control over.
Why am I a Christian? Why do I follow Christ? Because I can't see any other option for my life. Because without him, I don't think I can honestly say that I would be here right now. Because if I didn't follow him, I would follow someone/something else, and I couldn't live like that. Because without him, I might not have found all of you. And if I had, I would be so alone, that I couldn't realize how many people were right in front of me, and wanted to help me.
Peace Friends.
Why am I a Christian? Why do I follow Christ? Because I can't see any other option for my life. Because without him, I don't think I can honestly say that I would be here right now. Because if I didn't follow him, I would follow someone/something else, and I couldn't live like that. Because without him, I might not have found all of you. And if I had, I would be so alone, that I couldn't realize how many people were right in front of me, and wanted to help me.
Peace Friends.
posted by Elizbeth at 2:12 PM
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